DR. MEL'S MESSAGE - From my novels to my other projects, no telling what you will read. This is the only place you will get to read about how I developed a screenplay into a novel and what is the driving force. I will talk about many things from films to books to acting to producing. It really will depend on where my mind takes me. I hope you will join me on this journey.
Last weeked was a whirlwind as I was involved in writing, shooting, and editing a short film during the 48 Hour Film Festival in New Orleans. Wow! Talk about fast paced fun in the movie industry, I will cherish the time spent with the cast and crew. Our team leader, David Kirtland, of New Guy Films did a remarkable job in assembling a cast and crew that worked extremely well together. It was one of he smoothest sets I've been on. Did you have situations that we had to conquer? I'd say. Before the competition began, one of our lead actors, slipped and fell on his hip. He insisted he was all right and wouldn't go to a doctor. He worked through the pain for two days. Once we chose our category, our writing team wrote in his character as handicapped and ill. Finally after filming, he went to the emergency room where he learned he had broken his hip. I've heard breaking a leg before, but breaking a hip. his dedication to his craft, is unsurpassed, "The show must go on!" Get well Jerry.
We also encountered a flat tire on our main vehicle that was established. Luckily for us, our Director of Photography was also a former race car driver so a pit crew went into action and changed the tire in no time as we shot another scene.
If you ever get a chance to work on a 48 Hour Film Project, I highly recommend it.
Today old and young alike are in for a real treat learning about a children's book that addresses a scary subject -- rain and lightning. Now that we are in the midlle of a full blown Hurricane season, I completely understand the need for a book. Bad weather can be frightning for children. Author Keisha Sheronia Campell worte a wonderful book, PARTY IN THE SKY, that addresses this issue in a very cute book for children. Here is her author interview.
Tell your readers a
little about yourself, where you grew up, where you live now, where you went to
school etc. Let them get to know the personal you.
I was born on the beautiful island of Jamaica. As a young girl I remember being known as a story teller in school lol, I would ask the kids what they wanted to hear and I would belt out stories after stories, this went on from a young child to a young girl in high school. Eventually I moved to the US and attended high school in the Bronx, New York and now reside in Florida, the home of Mickey Mouse.
What inspired you to author this book?
My niece and nephew are my inspiration. They are ten, but at a
young age about four or five when it rained, they were scared. My niece has
autism, and it scared her quite a bit. I just imaged a story in my head to calm
them down, and it worked.
Where did you get the inspiration for your book’s cover?
It's a children's book about the weather and what better way to show what the book is about than to have kids on the cover enjoying the rain. I wanted a cover to engage the kids to read and even though the weather can be frightening, its also wonderful. Who doesn't love playing in the rain.
Who has been the most significant influence on you personally
and as a writer?
I would say myself because I love telling stories and with the addition of my niece and nephew to the family, I found my creative juice flowing. Kids are fun to watch and they give great ideas on what kids do, like, not like, etc. They are my judges.
What were your struggles or obstacles you
had to overcome to get this book written?
I had to believe in myself, to know I was capable of getting it
done. The cost to get a publisher was an eye-opening feat, but through research,
I found Fiverr, and the rest is history.
Tell your readers about your book.
The book is about Jeffy a young boy who's afraid of nature's
wonder and the journey he goes on with the help of his aunt Stacey to realize
that nature's wonder can be scary but fun at times. The lightning and thunder is scary for kids of all ages and some adults,
but with the illustrations of music, pool, pictures, etc., creates more of a
magical understanding for kids.
Who is your target audience, and why?
Daycare to grade three and beyond. Kids are innocent and not aware of what
nature is as far as the weather goes, they just see and hear frightening sounds
and sights of the weather which they are too young to understand. Take a peek at one of the illustrations for the book. It is so cute.
What do you consider your greatest success in life?
My greatest success in life is continuing to work hard and achieving goals I have set for myself. There's many more for me to tackle and succeed at. Also being the best Aunt.
What one unique thing sets you apart from other writers in your
genre?
My life stays extremely busy in my writing, editing and publishing world and I am thrilled because of it. After years of the 7:00 a.m. to 6:00 p.m. grind working outside my home, I retired from all of that and decided to work from home. At first I was scared how everything would work out. I had plenty of questions. What I discovered is that working from home gives you freedom. I also found that it gives me freedom to work from anywhere I want as I frequently travel. I bring this up because being able to do so also means that I have to have some sort of financial freedom. I worked hard for years to get this point in my life at 61-years-young. To frank, savings and investing was the key for me. In 1987 I made up my mind that one day I would be debt free. At that time I had debt, credit card debt, and my husband and I were paying our mortage and for two cars. We paid off the cars and eventually paid off the mortage. Do you know what else I did? I cut up all of my credit cards and paid them off. Today, we are debt free!
I mention all of this because I read an article today that most americans are up to their ears in debt and some owe more on credit cards than they make in a year. Ouch! If you want to do something about that, start researching how you can get out of debt and make a budget. Above else, don't spend what you don't have. That's my advice.
Here is something else for you if you live in Florida, where there are many retirees. I came across a book by Jodi Hockinson called LOW RISK INVESTING IN FLORIDA TAX CERTIFICATES. Find out how to invest YOUR money in Florida
taxes! There are millions of dollars in tax certificates sold every year. With
this low cost, informative booklet, receive a basic, working knowledge about
investing in Florida delinquent tax bills! The author, a long-time employee of
a county tax collector's office, discusses a variety of topics involving this
lower risk, higher yield type of investment. Learn about: Tax Deed Sales - Tax
Certificate Sales - What is a Tax Certificate? - How Do I Buy Tax Certificates?
- How Does my Investment Work? - What are the Advantages? - What are the
Disadvantages? - How to Get Started! This publication is intended to offer
basic information about making a solid return with Florida property taxes. It
is not all inclusive. For exact details, rules, statutes and fees, please
contact a Florida Tax Collector's office, or refer to Florida Statutes, Chapter
197. This is not a get a get-rich-quick scheme. Any opinions expressed in this
presentation reflect the personal opinions of the author. Please consult your
tax advisor prior to making any investment, tax certificate, tax deed, or
otherwise. The information offered in this publication is general knowledge
based on Florida Statute that is designed to help you in your decision to make
money by investing in Florida property taxes.
Good morning, or I though it was until I received a phone call from one of my daughters who borrowed my car last night. "Mom, first I didn't wreck your car." Whoa! My thoughts raced. Was she hurt? Are the grandchildren okay?" After she assured me that she didn't wreck my car and no one was injured, she informed me that someone slashed two of my tires and tried to steal my hubcaps off my Jaguar.
Do you know how expensive tires and rims are for a Jaguar? I feel like I need to start a Go Fund Me page. Just kidding about that, but what is wrong with people? Get a job and quit stealing and vandalising other's property.
Now that I vented and calmed down thanks to the tricks I learned from C J Kaleb's book HOW TO CALM DOWN that I had the honor of editing and publishing, I called Triple AAA so that they could tow my car to to my favorite tire service. Here is where God's plan intervened. I have to accept the fact that God doesn't put on us anything we can't handle. I should know this very well since in the last four weeks I have had gallbladder surgery, hurt my back and had to go back in the hospital two weeks later for that, Hurricane Barry came my way, my mom went in the hospital, my sister went in the hospital twice, and my nephew went into the hospital after falling of a roof and is facing surgery. Wow Nelly! Like I needed one more thing on my plate. This is how God intervened for me today. While I was on the phone with Sally, the Triple AAA representative, I asked her if she liked to read books as I never miss an opportunity to pitch any of my novels. That's when her voice perked up. She not only loves to read, she is writing her first novel. Now, guess who gets to edit and publish it? ME! So, even through diversity God has a plan. I would have never have met Sally, if it weren't for the rotten scoundrals. Life lesson here, through evil there will be good in God's plan.
I did get a smile on my face when I discovered that the book I edited, published and promoted I AM A LEADER: A 90-DAY JOURNAL FOR KIDS is still listed as the #1 New Release on Amazon and it is also on sale for the next couple of days. You should grab a copy of that today while you can.
Now back to the Go Fund Me page that I was kidding about. You can help me recoup the cost of the vandals by purchasing any of my fabulous eBooks, paperback books or audiobooks. In fact, if you want a free code to download either one of my audible books the first ten people who email me at drmelcaudle@gmail.com and tell me they want a copy, I'll send them a free promp code for them. I know that seems counterintuitive to my plight, but I want people to enjoy the books. I only ask that if you do, please leave me an honest review on Goodreads and Amazon.
Take a look at the trailer for each of my books. And, if you have already read any of them and haven't left an honest review on either Goodreads or Amazon, please do.
Email me if you want a free promo code to the Audible version of NEVER STOP RUNNING to drmelcaudle@gmail.com. The first fifteen will receive them. Please tell me what country you are from so that I can send you the correct code. You have to listen to Jessie Drumm who narrated this book for me.
Email me if you want a free promo code to the Audible version of HOW TO LAUNCH AND MARKET A BOOK, narrated by Timothy Burke, to drmelcaudle@gmail.com. The first fifteen will receive them. Please tell me what country you are from so that I can send you the correct code.
I want to introduce you to a fabulous author, Danyelle Scroggins. We have something in common -- we both reside in the great state Louisiana; so we have a kndred bond between us. Danyelle has authored numerous books and writes with a Christian flair. Here is her interview below.
Tell your readers a little about
yourself, where you grew up, where you live now, where you went to school etc.
Let them get to know the personal you.
My name is Danyelle Scroggins. I was born and raised in
Shreveport, Louisiana. After a seven-year duty tour as a military wife, I moved
back home, divorced, and now live in a small town called Gloster. I am the
Senior Pastor of New Vessels Ministries North in Shreveport, Louisiana. I am
the author of both Christian fiction and non-fiction books.I studied Theology
at Louisiana Baptist University, have a Psychology Degree from the University
of Phoenix, an Interdisciplinary Degree, and a Masters in Religious Education
from Liberty University. I am the owner of Divinely Sown Publishing LLC.
What inspired you to author this book?
This is book 4 of a wonderful series entitled The E Love
Series- inspired by my new granddaughter Emiya’rai. This entire series is
so special to me because it's my first series and it has done quite well.
Where did you get the inspiration for your book’s cover?
My cover model on this particular book is my son. On book 1-3
are my daughters. It has been a blessing to have them on my team, and they
encourage me so much.
Who has been the most significant influence on you personally and
as a writer?
I would have to first give this credit solely to the Lord. I
have been gifted with the art of telling stories, and it has been a blessing
from the Most High for sure. Lately, I've also been influenced by a wonderful
author who goes by the pen name Liz Isaacson. She's been the perfect example of
pushing through and doing what you are put on earth to do.
What were your struggles or obstacles you had to overcome to get
this book written?
To be honest, I have no struggles writing the books that are
sown into my heart, it's the promotions for me. The struggle of having to
promote and write at the same time can be overwhelming. But as with all things,
I've been praying about this too.
Tell your readers
about your book.
Dwight loves all things
female, but he’s not settling down until he finds someone who fits the category
of extraordinary.
She has to be all the things he’s seen in his mother and more, but until then,
he has his mindset to keep doing what his Uncle Butter suggested; give the rats
some cheese.
The only woman he might have settled with, Jamecia, is now wearing white boy
Jacob on her arm. Little does Dwight know, he’s about to come face to face with
the next best thing to Jamecia, her sister Jayla.
Jayla has had her share of dudes, but this time, she’s made a promise to her
sister and to God to stop searching for the right guy. After a few failed
relationship, she almost believes that love is not in the plan for her.
That doesn’t stop her from being all in with making sure her cousin Nathan’s
bridesmaids have the best wedding shoes her hands can make.
What Jayla doesn’t know is the guy she’s instructed to escort to the groom’s
dressing room, could very well be the guy who is going to change her life
completely.
Who is your target audience, and why?
I believe that those who love sweet romance and inspirational,
but Christian books are my audience, but I welcome anyone who loves to read,
and I will tell you why. When writers look for their niche audience, they look
for those who like their genre, but I also would like to reach those who may
have never tried the genre of Christian Fiction. So, because I have sense
enough to know that everyone is not my audience, I'd definitely put my energies
into targeting those who love the Lord.
What do you consider your greatest success in life?
My greatest success is raising three wonderful children who are
college-educated and love all things books.
What one unique thing sets you apart from other writers in your
genre?
The one thing that sets me apart is knowing that I write exactly
what the Lord has placed on my heart. It was the one thing that kept
traditional publishers from accepting my books, but also the same thing that
has caused me to be in the business for over eighteen years and thriving.
I woke up this morning bright and early ready to go to work; that is, in my home office. I've grown rather fond of working from home. I remember the grind of getting up at 5:00 a.m. to get ready and get my children off to school so that I could at my desk by 6:45 a.am. I did that for more than twenty years. What was I thinking? It is true, that if you love what you do, you'll never work a day in your life; and frankly, I love authoring books, writing my blog, editing other author's work, and marketing books. Yes, I said that dirty work that most authors hate to do -- MARKET.
Truth be told, if an author doesn't market their book, or have somone else market it, you are most likely to only sell a couple of hundred books. Just last night, one of the fantastic authors I am working with to help her publish her book asked, "How many books do you think I will sell?"
"Wait a minute." I took a deep breath and paused before I answered her. "I will have to be honest with you. It depends on the reader's interest, if they like your topic and genre, how well the book is written, the cover, and how much exposure the book gets." That was a mouthful with a long conversation that needed to be followed. That is why I decided to write this Author Tip today.
It is not longer good enough to author a fantastic book, self-publish it, which by the way I don't recommend, and sit back and hope you generate sales. That method simply doesn't work. Why? Today's book market is drenched with millions of millions of books and if a reader doesn't know about your book, they can't buy it. How do you get them to learn about your book? The critical key is to market, market, and market it. Oh, did I say you must market your book? Afraid so.
I know what you're thinking, "I'm an author and I don't want to be bogged down with marketing. I want to write my next book." I get it. I love the craft of authoring a book. It is exhilerating. The only thing that can match that is seeing your book launch as the #1 New Release on Amazon; and that doesn't come easy. It takes work, effort, time, and a formula. It was only after I published several of my books that I finally figured out the formula to marketing so that I could launch my books as the #1 New Release on Amazon and I share that strategy in my new book HOW TO LAUNCH AND MARKET A BOOK: THE SIX MONTH COUNTDOWN. This book is only $4.99 in paperback and just yesterday it became avaiable as an audiobook narrated by Timothy Burke. My tip for you today is to purchase this book in any format your desire, and follow the methods if you want to launch book as the #1 New Release on Amazon or if your current book isn't selling and you want to boost your sales. It is filled with step-by-step actions and comes with six checklists to keep you targeted and on track with your marketing. Also, if all else fails, and you really don't want to market your book on your own, your in luck. I have a service for $450 and I will market your book using the strategies in my book. Take a look inside the book below.
I know it is very rare that I do two blog posts in one day, but I can't help myself because my new audiobook HOW TO LAUNCH AND MARKET A BOOK: SIX MONTH COUNTDOWN, narrated by Timothy Burke, just became available hours ago. Are you kidding me? This is exciting news because now, authors who are on the run can listen and learn how I market my books as the #1 New Release on Amazon. I am actually hitting a great batting average, not only with the books that I authored but also with the books I have edited and published with my publishing company Absolute Author Publishing House. The formula I present is real and it works. Just this weekend, Peter J. Liang, author of I AM A LEADER A 90-DAY LEADERSHIP JOURNAL FOR KIDS launched his book and guess who marketed it? Me, using the strategies I presented in my book. It opened as the #1 New Release. I have to give him a shout out because the book is awesome.
Other authors have had the same success using the methods and techniques in my book. L. A Davis, and her book WHERE ARE MY CHILDREN?! not only made the #1 New Release but also in four categories. Wow! That's a huge congrats!
The system I outline in HOW TO LAUNCH AND MARKET A BOOK works. In fact, my books have consistently launched as the #1 New Release not only in paperback, eBook but as recently as last week in audible when NEVER STOP RUNNING launched as the #1 New Release in audible. Oh, it also opened as the #1 New Release in paperback last January. So what are you waiting for? If you are an author about to launch a book or need to market it, grab my book HOW TO LAUNCH AND MARKET A BOOK: SIX MONTH COUNTDOWN now!
Tell your readers a little about yourself, where you grew up, where you live now, where you went to school etc. Let them get to know the personal you.
I grew up and went to school in the Detroit, Michigan, area. I first aspired to be a musician and obtained a bachelor’s degree in music on the classical organ. After several years I realized how difficult it is to make a living in music and I found I was talented with computers. I then spent several years as a system administrator, software/hardware QA analyst, and as a desktop support/PC technician. After I found myself unemployed due to a merger/downsizing at the company I worked for, I decided to get into radio. I’ve often been told, “You have a radio voice,” and so I went back to school to become a radio news/anchor reporter. After spending several years at that job, I once again found myself unemployed due to upheavals in the radio business. It was at that point that audiobooks were becoming accessible and technology had advanced such that producing studio-quality audio at home was possible. I’ve always loved to read (I don’t even own a television, and I have not actually sat and watched TV in more than 12 years) so, with all the other factors taken into consideration, I built a home studio and have been narrating audiobooks for nearly two years now.
What inspired you to become a narrator?
The fact that I love to read, I’m told I have the voice for it, and once I tried it, I was hooked. I find that I get more “job satisfaction” out of narrating audiobooks than out of any of my previous occupations. Moreover, I get to work from home and set my schedule.
Do you have a preferred genre?
I do not. The majority of my work so far has been in non-fiction (i.e., self-help books, history books, books on spirituality, etc.) but I have done one fantasy/fiction novel and am currently working on a murder/mystery novel. I love fiction and plan to do more of it, but I find it is a lot more work than non-fiction. I must also confess that I have never had any voice coaching or voice acting lessons – that is on my to-do list as I pursue more fiction work.
What has been your favorite section or chapter you narrated from any book?
That would come from “The Light of Supremazia (Afterlife Lessons)” by Alana (Siegle) Mag. The premise of the book is a young girl who finds that she can see and talk to ghosts. She finds herself in a special school, the Vita Postmortem Academy, where she is taught how to deal with her special talent. The teachers in the school were all ghosts of famous people from history, so I got to voice JFK, Alber Einstein, Sammy Davis Jr., and more. Even Marylin Monroe!
What were your struggles or obstacles you had to overcome to produce an audiobook?
Mostly overcoming self-doubt and accepting that no one person's voice is good for every kind of narration. I’ve learned not to take rejection personally, even when I’ve been told that I didn’t get the contract because my voice sounded “too polished and professional” and this has happened more times than I like.
What production companies do you work with?
ACX and Beacon Audiobooks, so far.
What one unique thing sets you apart from other narrators?
That is a difficult question to answer because I believe every narrator is unique. We each have a unique voice, narration style, and a unique way of doing business. However, when I am narrating for a client, I see myself as part of a team rather than “just the narrator” and, as part of that team, our goal is to produce the best audiobook possible. I also try to establish an excellent professional working relationship with my clients, which, I believe, has lead to many repeat customers.
How do you prepare your voice before narrating?
I simply sing a few lines from whatever song pops into my head at the moment. I find this sufficient for loosening up my voice for narration.
Do you have a preference for fiction or non-fiction? Why?
I find that, like many things in life, there are advantages and disadvantages to both. I like narrating non-fiction because it is relatively quick and easy and I’ve found some pretty interesting non-fiction books to narrate, such as “Leif Erikson: A Captivating Guide to the Viking Explorer Who Beat Columbus to America and Established a Norse Settlement at Vinland.” I found the subject matter interesting, and it was challenge learning how to pronounce Norse and Norweigan name! I do find that fiction is a lot more work (keeping track of character voices, aiming for the right emotion, etc.) but it is a lot more fun!
How do you go about marketing your audiobook?
Until just recently, I left the marketing chores to the publishers and authors or rights holders. I realize that this is not going to further my career as I would like, so I’ve begun posting samples of my audiobooks on my web site and doing my best to keep my ACX samples list and my SoundCloud account up to date. I’ve also begun producing video trailers for my books (and other narrators as an add-on service) and am just learning how to use them as an effective marketing tool. I believe that, like many other narrators, I stink at marketing and I have a lot to learn.
How do you choose the books you want to narrate?
I simply see what is available on ACX and choose what piques my interest and has a decent pay rate. I’ve recently signed with Beacon Audiobooks, and they assign the books that they feel you would be good at, but that is how I got my first contract for a murder mystery. I also, on occasion, will audition for something that is outside my comfort zone. That was how I got the contract for “The Light of Supremazia.” I auditioned for it not expecting to get the contract – mind you the story is told in the first person from the point of view of a 14-year-old girl. I have a bass/baritone voice, but after I submitted the audition, the author said, “Love, love, love it! I love the way you bring my book to life!” Who’d have thought it?
Describe what your recording studio? Also, please submit a picture of it. Attached
My studio is a DIY project measuring 7’ high by 6’ wide by 4’ deep. I built it by combining aspects from a number of DIY audio booth plans that are out on the web. It consists of a 2 x 4 frame with 5/8” drywall on the outside, acoustic insulation between the joists, and the inside is covered with 1/2 soundboard and acoustic foam.
What is your preferred equipment in microphones, headsets, software, etc?
I’ve used various pieces of equipment as my narration career has evolved, and I suspected that would continue. However, I’m currently using a Rode NT1 mic running through a Focusrite Scarlett Solo USB Audio Interface, and I use Adobe Audition as my DAW with a number of plug-ins for audio processing and mastering. I have a set of Sennheiser HD201 headphones, but I only use them if I need to do some very detailed editing. Usually, I listen through a set of Edirol MA-15D studio monitors, and I don’t use my headphones while recording. When I first started in radio, and very experienced news director (whom I admire to a high degree) advised I not use headphones while recording. He explained that most people tend not to speak naturally when they can hear themselves through headphones and, in my case, I’ve found this to be true.
What one piece of advice do you have for new narrators.
I would tell new narrators several things, including to keep in mind that no one voice fits everything and don’t take rejection personally. However, if I had only one piece of advice, it would be one of my favorite quotes…
“Nothing in this world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not: nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not: the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent.” – Calvin Coolidge, 30th President of the United States
Tell your readers anything else you want to share.
I woke up this morning and realized that the month of July is a third of the way gone and only in a matter of weeks children will be going back to school or going to school for the first time. Ouch! That really emotionally hurts for me because, since the first day of my granddaughter's birth, I have babysat her. My mom, tells me that my granddaughter is my Velcro baby. We are best friends in every way and spend a lot of time together coloring, painting, swimming, feeding the ducks, taking walks to smell the roses, shopping, and she has spent hours in my office at her "Desk" editing or in my lap as I edit reading a book or watching educational videos. So, why does this hurt that school is starting? She starts pre-school, oh my. NO!!!! I want her with me. Trust me when I say it was easier sending my three daughters off to kindergarten, than sending my best friend to pre-school. I know, I'll adjust.
When I think of the adjustment my daughter will have with her morning routine of now getting my granddaughter and her two older boys up in the morning, feeding them, getting their lunches, and making sure they have their homework, I relaxed. No, not me. I've been there and done that.
Change is inevitable. However, I am currently working with an author, Peter J. Liang, who has a fabulous book that can help children from eight to twelve develop leadership skills and I am proud to announce that my publishing company Absolute Author Publishing House published it. During this process, we Beta tested the book with four of my grandkids and they loved it; so, I can personally recommend the book. I have more excitement to share because his book launched over the weekend as the #1 New Release on Amazon. Congratulations Peter for writing a wonderful book for children.
Now for a special treat, Peter is guest blogging for me today. I think you'll find it very interesting as it speaks to the topic of getting your children ready for school in the morning without all the fuss.
GUEST BLOGGER - PETER J. LIANG
The #1 Strategy to a Less Stressful Morning with Kids
“Morning is an important time of day because how you spend your morning can often tell you what kind of day you are going to have.” – Lemony Snicket
One of the core lessons I teach during my Leadership4Kids program is that morning is an important time of the day. How you spend your morning can often tell you what kind of day you are going to have. That’s why, as you can see below, I ask kids to pay close attention to their mornings and track their “morning happiness” in their I AM A LEADER journal.
As parents, we have all been there. Getting an entire family up, dressed, fed, and out the door in the morning is no walk in the park. According to the American Institute of Stress (yes, there is such an institute), morning is one of the most stressful times of day for most families.
However, do mornings have to be this way? In fact, instead of stressful, what if mornings are the most beautiful and peaceful time of day? Is this possible? If so, what’s the best morning routine?
I get that question a lot when talking to the parents from my Leadership 4 Kids program. The honest answer is that there is NO such a thing as the best morning routine. It is really whatever works for you and your family. Every child is different, every family is different, and we have to try different ideas and see what works the best for our situation.
With that said, there is one underlying strategy that seems to lead to a less stressful morning for most kids and families. And that strategy is called “help me, help you.”Here’s a scenario to illustrate what I mean
The bus will be here in five minutes, and my ten-year-old son can’t find his homework, AGAIN!
With this “Help me, help you” strategy, as a parent,the only question you want to think about at this moment is, “How can I help?” Your choices are either I am going to search around the house and help him find it, or if I can’t find it or don’t have the time, let him suffer the natural consequence.
As such, there would be no lecturing, no yelling, no scolding, and no, “How many times have I told you that you should pack your book bag the night before,” because none of that is “Helpful” in the morning. If a parent feels the need to talk to the kid about this, unless it’s a serious emergency, just wait till the end of the day or in the evening to have that conversation.
This strategy extends to all family members, husband, wife, siblings, and every family member is expected is to help one another, if needed. No yelling, no whining. All that can wait. What I have found is most of the time, whatever the problem was in the morning, by the time it gets to the end of the day, it’s forgotten.
This is great, right? What a simple strategy. Well, like most strategies, it’s simple to understand but very difficult to do.Because, what this strategy requires us (as parents) to do is, at that very moment (when something didn’t go as planned), to put our own need to “Express our frustration” aside, and prioritize the family’s need to “Have a less stressful morning,” In other words, it requires is a lot of presence and self-awareness on the part of the parents.
As parents, it’s very easy for us to get annoyed or triggered in the morning and before you know it, we are already raising our voices and barking out orders, “How many times have I told you to pack your homework the night before and you never listen.”The problem with this kind of verbal sparring in the morning is: 1) It’s not going to magically change kids behavior, 2) It’s not helpful to the situation, and 3) It sets off a chain reaction which carries into the next interaction, the next person we encounter, onto the bus, when they get to school, etc. The ripple effect is often more profound than we can imagine.
So how do you gain that sense of presence, to create that space in the morning? Again, different people have different solutions, and I can only share my own experience.For me, it’s very important to take a 45-60 minutes walk in the morning before the rest of my family get up. It doesn’t matter rain, shine, snow. That’s my anchor for the day.
During the walk, I usually just let my mind wander. It could be new ideas related to work, some presentations I have to give next week, listening to an entertaining podcast or audio book, basically whatever I feel like. There are days, for whatever reason, I feel stressed. Then I do a walking meditation in the Zen Buddhism tradition, to unwind and ground myself a bit more. Ten times out of ten, when I get home from my these morning walk, I feel happier and ready for the day.
This works for me but may not work for everyone, and even with that, I have had my fair share of stressful mornings as well. We all have those days, and that’s the ebb and flow of family life, but the point is we all need to pay more attention to our mornings and find our way to a beautiful and peaceful morning. Some people take five min mindfulness meditation, whereas some go workout. There are lots of easy ways, as mentioned in Tim Ferris popular blog on morning routine – 5 Morning Rituals That Help You Win the day. The point is simply -- by bringing more presence and following a simple “How can I help you” strategy; it will lead to a less stressful morning with kids. As the old proverb goes
Hold on, there is more to come and this author interview comes just in time for all of the college graduates who will now enter the job market. Today, getting into the door of the company who want to work for is hard than ever and the competition is strong. That is why graduates must arm themselves to make the first impression. Ernest Enabulele is a Best-selling author of "Interview Preparation And Success Tips" and "Effective Interview Tips," interview coach, motivational speaker and CV/Career Specialist based in London, England and can help you achieve your dreams. Read about him and his book below.
Tell your readers a little about yourself, where you grew up, where you live now, where you went to school etc. Let them get to know the personal you.
Ernest Enabulele is a Best-selling author of "Interview Preparation And Success Tips" and "Effective Interview Tips," interview coach, motivational speaker and CV/Career Specialist based in London, England. I grew up in Nigeria began coming to London to study mental health nursing, presently live in London, and l also studied literature at a university in Nigeria.
What inspired you to author this book?
What inspired me to write this book is due to the demands of my clients; i.e, job applicants yearning to read my books based on the fact that I am an interview coach with more than ten years experience. Having been preparing job applicants for a range of job interview scenarios l noticed they struggle with lack of preparation, low self-esteem, and more.
1Where did you get the inspiration for your book’s cover?
Michelle Obama’s book cover.
2 Who has been the most significant influence on you personally and as a writer?
Steve Harvey, Barrack Obama, and TD Jakes.
What were your struggles or obstacles you had to overcome to get this book written?
Self-doubt, getting the right audience for my book, how to market the book.
Tell your readers about your book.
In “Interview Preparation and Success Tips,” you will discover:
1. The twenty tried and tested Do´s to succeed at every job interview, 2. The five most important steps for successful interview preparation, 3. How to make an exceptional first impression that no one will ever forget, 4. Key tips for isolating your biggest strengths and how to show them to the interviewer, 5. How to answer the ten most common job interview questions, 6. Techniques for dealing with difficult and unexpected questions, 7. The seven expert tips for making sure you don’t become tongue-tied, 8. A guide to the special method that has helped countless graduates land their dream jobs, 9. The forty-five most common behavioral questions, and
much, much more.
5Who is your target audience, and why?
Job applicants who are struggling to land the job of their dreams.
6What do you consider your greatest success in life?
A man of value, writing interview guide books and also a bestselling author on Amazon.
7What one unique thing sets you apart from other writers in your genre?
Passionate about my books to ensure it solves the problem for job applicants who have been turned down in various job interviews attended.
