Sunday, June 7, 2020

What I Tell Myself FIRST: Children's Real-World Affirmations of Self Esteem


First and foremost, thank everyone who reached out to me during this horrific weather as a tropical storm moved across my city. My family and I are safe and we were blessed not to have any damage. Priase God for His blessing and protection. Now, my prayer is that everyone else is safe in the path of this destructive weather.

Now for what you came for, and that is to learn about a new book and meet an author. You're in for a treat with today's author, Michael A. Brown and his book "What I Tell Myself FIRST: Children's Real-World Affirmations of Self Esteem."




What I Tell Myself FIRST: Children's Real-World Affirmations of Self Esteem Kindle Edition

by Michael Brown  (Author), Zoe Ranucci (Illustrator), Kendra Middleton Williams (Editor)  Format: Kindle Edition



BUY NOW ON AMAZON
Written by a US military veteran, this children's book, based on Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs, will instill in children the answer to bullying, body-shaming, hate, and attacks on the self through daily affirmations. Author Mike Brown has learned many life lessons and hopes to convey some of those lessons acquired from public and private service in the Army, as a police officer, an anger management specialist, nonviolent crisis intervention instructor, educator, as well as the real-world wisdom accumulated so far, to everyone that reads this book. Teaching a sense of self-love as well as self-acceptance and giving a framework for both parents and children to help build their lives into sturdy and happy homes is his goal. What I Tell Myself FIRST: Children's Real-World Affirmations of Self Esteem is to readers what the AED is to a heart: it instills the defibrillator of self-esteem so powerful for when times are tough, and your mind is under attack. Mike hones in on his military past and the methodology behind why servicemembers say creeds in various forms and military occupational specialties. This book will serve its purpose not for when times are good. But for when times are bad, when one is on that dark road, and it feels like no one is there. It will serve as the proverbial jump pack to the battery of the mind, like the hug that you needed but did not get and like the words you needed to hear but did not hear. This book of reality-based daily affirmations are the "I wish I had this" of books. We MUST instill in our children the answer to bullying, body-shaming, hate, and attacks on the self through daily affirmations.

A lot of adults have dark roads.

Started from when they were young. The hug they didn't get. The pain they didn't learn to manage because mom and/or dad patched mostly all of their wounds and fought mostly all their battles. Traveling through life, hearing, "You're fat. You're slow. You're not like us. You're ugly. I felt disrespected when he said...No one loves me."



I fell for this person because I needed love. Who knew that he'd (or she'd) be... It's your job to make me feel like... "WHY DON'T YOU WANT ME?!"


If only we'd learn very early on that these things were our jobs to perform. If only we'd learn to do for self in every way.


"A wonderful book that should be read with every child.

 It is also beautifully illustrated." Dr. Mel






MICHAEL BROWN

Tell your readers a little about yourself, where you grew up, where you live now, where you went to school etc. Let them get to know the personal you.

Born in Chicago, IL, I am a product of the Chicago Public School system. I served in the United States Army and various communities as a police officer. I am currently the President and Chief Executive Officer of MABMA Enterprises, LLC, and the principal instructor of Security Training Concepts, a training agency specializing in collegiate/career occupational courses in multiple criminal justice and self-defense-related disciplines. I also serve as a nationally-certified anger management specialist and Crisis Prevention Institute-certified nonviolent crisis intervention instructor. I am the father of four beautiful children and believe in raising them into the best strong, capable, productive, responsible, and most importantly, happy human beings they can be. I am an advocate of education and am a graduate of Governors State University in University Park, Illinois, having been conferred a Bachelor of Arts degree in Interdisciplinary Studies (Criminal Justice, Psychology and Philosophy) in 2006 and a Master of Arts degree in Criminal Justice in 2012. I serve as an innovative and fresh approach to leadership, training, and empowerment. I am a member of the International Law Enforcement Educators and Trainers Association, the National Anger Management Association, and the Society of Children's Book Writers and Illustrators.

What inspired you to author this book?

I am not an author by trade. I became one by trauma. I was helping an anger management client with issues related to her anger. In doing so, I learned that a great percentage of anger happens when childhood voids, created by broken parents, are imparted in children, thereby continuing to reside in now-anatomically/statutorily mature adults. These voids are the motivations for the often ill-prepared or toxic choices we make as adults. This would be the revelation I would learn in the wake of mother's passing: those who seek to use you will spot your voids and capitalize on them for their own gain. I then could not continue to hate my mother for the pain she caused, for I now knew the motivation which influenced her choices. She was broken. As a result, I became broken. I then loved her again. I understood her. I then set out to find solutions to change what parents don't do and what children don't know: how to address the real world and prepare for the inevitable to achieve self-actualization. I always heard of affirmations. Plenty of books have them, usually filled with "I am" this and that. But they leave out the real-world attacks that parents know are coming. They hide the truth from our children.



When I traveled with this book pre-COVID-19, I learned more globally about children's curiosity is great for, according to Arnold Edinborough, "Curiosity is the very basis of education, and if you tell me that curiosity killed the cat, I say only the cat died nobly." One should be noble in their quest for knowledge. I am a rather animated teacher. So, we are all having fun when I present. I love reaching their hearts and minds. Some of them bring me to tears, happily. Their responses and truth are so refreshing. This is actually therapeutic for me. However, you can actually tell the children who are suffering from pain at home. They don't participate. No poker faces. They don't believe what is being said. Children have yet to develop filters. It is rather easy to see their non-participation as a likely indicator. It is furthermore sad to say that some daycares are NOT teaching the children anything. They are just babysitters being taught by televisions. In some, the discipline is lacking for story time. That, too, was and is my continuous inspiration.

Where did you get the inspiration for your book's cover?

The cover is the work of my wonderful illustrator, Zoe Ranucci. I allowed her creativity to flow with my vision. NAILED IT!



Who has been the most significant influence on you personally and as a writer?

Abraham Maslow.

What were your struggles or obstacles you had to overcome to get this book written?

I am the product of child abuse. The reasons? I still couldn't tell you what I had done to earn physical chastisement. Usually, children remember some of the things they did to earn punishment. I don't. I then began to hate my mother. I never understood, as most children don't, why a mother who is supposed to be your guardian would physically chastise me like she did. I then began to run away into the arms of my grandmother.

Growing up, I would move between my mother's and grandmother's homes from time to time. In both homes, my brother, sister, uncle, and I went to various churches. As time passed, my mother inherited property as a result of my great-grandmother's death. My mother appeared to have been fascinated with the church, as is the tradition among African Americans to have either been born into Christianity and attend church or seek Christianity, its assistance, and fellowship in a time of need. A building plan was finalized and donations were being solicited from the church members to erect it.

My mother, believing bigger, giving equaled bigger and faster lottery-like blessings, refinanced her inherited property, being our residence. She then donated over 85% (approximately $30,000) of the finances from the loan to the church. The building would never be built. Her donation and neglect of the duties for which the funds were acquired resulted in the foreclosure of the property and us being in a homeless state, with mother never to question the disposition of the donation or demand its return. Why did a mother with children do such a thing? The need for assistance and association in time of need, I would later learn, is the doorway by which some self-proclaimed pastors capitalize on those in said state to acquire, among other things, monetary donations while delivering spiritual stimulation as the payback. Mother gave all selflessly for the promise of earthly riches that would never come. She passed in 2018.



Tell your readers about your book.

Based on Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs, What I Tell Myself FIRST: Children's Real-World Affirmations of Self-Esteem is a book of real-world affirmations that highlight the various abilities and attributes of the reader while exposing readers to realistic possibilities of rejection of difference in various forms. What I Tell Myself FIRST then enables readers to form mental frameworks to surmount those forms of rejection of difference and achieve positive self-actualization. This book is to readers what the AED is to a heart: it instills the defibrillator of self-esteem so powerful that it addresses bullying, body-shaming, hate, learning abilities, failure, and outside attacks on the self by other people who may need the very same help themselves. For when times are tough, and your mind is under attack, this book of reality-based daily affirmations are the "I wish I had this" of books. We MUST instill in our children the answer to bullying, body-shaming, hate, and attacks on the self through reality-based daily affirmations. What I Tell Myself FIRST is also for adults still dealing with childhood traumas and parenting on that motivation. The book is likened to the Trojan horse into the adult mind: the words used are multi-directional and will reach the inner wounded child within the adult who may have continued the cycle of hurt through bad parenting.

Who is your target audience, and why?

Children are my target audience and their parents as a byproduct. What I Tell Myself FIRST is also for parents still dealing with childhood traumas and parenting on that motivation. The book is likened to the Trojan horse into the adult mind: the words used are multi-directional and will reach the inner wounded child within the adult who may have continued the cycle of hurt through bad parenting. I am undertaking this task, not just for my children, but for the world's children with whom my children may contact. When we try to save face to our children, they often repeat what they see us do. In an attempt to remain their friend, some, if not most, parents do not discipline (mentally) their children, for their children are their security blanket to fill the Security and Love/Belonging stages of Maslow. Exposing our past mistakes and our motives, along with verbalizing and applying the principles taught in What I Tell Myself FIRST will assist in saving our children from a past.



What do you consider your greatest success in life?

My children. My teaching platforms. I make a difference.

What one unique thing sets you apart from other writers in your genre?

Holly Connors said it best in her Feathered Quill review of What I Tell Myself FIRST, "Unlike many books that give kids an unrealistic message that they are wonderful at everything, and that they can do anything, What I Tell Myself FIRST gives kids a real-world message that "I am great at some things. I am good at other things. I am not good at some things," but that's okay and the author tells his audience why....I've read/reviewed a lot of books aimed at children with the goal of teaching them how to handle difficult situations such as bullying. Some of them just aren't realistic in their suggestions. What I liked so much about this book is that it tells kids that before they can solve other problems/issues, they must first love themselves. It also says that they may not be the best, prettiest, strongest, etc., but that that's okay. As long as "I am beautiful/handsome TO ME" it's okay. What a great message!" This, I argue, is what sets me apart in the affirmations genre.